Homebodies - Productive solitude is necessary

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Published on Sunday, April 24, 2016

By Rita Friesen

The Neepawa Banner

‘Solitude, clearly, isn’t our most comfortable state. But based on recent research, we’d be wise to overcome anxiety around being by ourselves. While nobody’s advocating becoming a hermit, there are benefits to spending at least some time alone each day’. An excerpt from Reader’s Digest October 2015 - ‘Why it pays to spend time alone – One Is the Loveliest Number’ by Megan Jones.

The recent research referred to included people left in isolation and the only means of breaking the boredom was to self administer a small, painful electric shock. Sixty per cent of the men and a quarter of the women broke their solitude with electric shocks! Really?! “Physical pain, it seemed, was preferable to spending a few minutes alone with their thoughts”. I warrant the test group did not have a high percentage of single seniors! Male or female. 

As a farm raised contributing member of society, I recognise ‘productive solitude’. It was hours out on the cabless, radioless tractor, hours of head bent gently against the warm side of the cow at milking time. It was long walks checking the fences and solitary forays to round up cattle or sheep. Hours picking roots, hauling bales, chucking firewood. Productive solitude allowed one to dream and plan – perhaps dreaming and planning an escape from the drudgery of farm work! Another quote from the same article –”Reflecting on our actions and thinking about future personal improvements are the cornerstones of productive solitude.” 

What was life like before radio, movies, television, telephone and electronic communication? In conversation with several family members, we reflected on the majestic castles and cathedrals built centuries ago. The ornate gargoyles, the breathtakingly beautiful painted ceilings, stained glass windows. What kind of productive solitude lay behind those inventions and what hours of productive solitude have generations of viewers invested? That said, with the increasingly complex world in which we live, new and radical ideas are prolific and beneficial to humanity. Poets, authors and artists are as noteworthy now as they were in a ‘simpler, quieter’ time.

The study went on to explain that people moving in groups, or even pairs, are generally kinder to strangers than a lone individual. But that makes sense from a perceived safety sense. It also statistically showed that when people go to a show, a concert or in general  out alone, they had a better time than they imagined they would. I know that! It is the thought of going to a function by myself that is daunting, the being there is generally positive.

I do believe that most folks are hesitant to embrace solitude. We have the television on, or music playing, or check emails or play games on devices. But just to be silent, alone? Klinenberg, a sociology professor at New York University, says it well –”Unless you are completely content with who you are and the way you are, productive solitude is necessary.”